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Nudes before Dudes

A look at the female craze of sending nudes to your besties.

The ‘nude’: a staple of modern day society, frowned upon by most, but seen as an expression of self-confidence and body positivity by others. Us average Joes aren’t the only ones that enjoy snapping a nude selfie or two. From Kim Kardashian and Emily Ratajkowski standing together topless posing for a mirror selfie, to Justin Bieber showing the world where the good lord split him; celebrities are as proud of their bodies as we are of ours. It’s commonplace to have heard the stories about girls sending nudes to that guy they fancy, but why on earth do girls send nudes to each other?

As with most things nowadays – in this period of extreme over-sensitivity - there is a massive stigma and a bizarre double standard surrounding nude pictures. If you send nude pictures to a guy or choose to share your naked/half-naked body on social media, you’re seen as ‘trashy’, ‘slutty’ and ‘attention-seeking’. If a guy has his bare bottom on display or is standing naked with his hands expertly placed over his crown jewels, there’ll be an array of flattering comments ranging from ‘fitty’ to ‘show us what’s underneath!’. For us, it’s a lose-lose situation.

Sending nudes to your best girlfriends is completely non-sexual – it’s sort of like a safe-space for you to show off, whilst receiving compliments that no doubt inflate your ego, all the while not being judged for your openness. Sounds great, right? Reasons for sending them can range from wanting to parade around in some new, sexy lingerie, knowing full-well that you look cute (let’s be honest, we’ve all done it), to wanting your friends approval of a picture before sending it to that guy that’s been hounding you for days. You know that nothing bad will happen to your photos in the hands of your friends, which leads me to my next point: It’s all about trust.

You could know a guy semi-well (I’m talking, having spoken to them for a few weeks) or be life-long friends; it doesn’t make the idea of them getting your nude photos any less risky. I’m sure there’s a niggling feeling in the back of most girls’ minds that has them thinking that their photos will end up in the wrong hands. Those photos could be subject to harsh words and total mockery in a WhatsApp group chat with him and his ‘lads’. Slating you and your appearance, but telling you that you’re the hottest girl he’s ever seen. The worst part about it all? You’d be none the wiser.

Some of the most important elements of a good photo include angles, lighting and poses. These are deemed irrelevant when it comes to sending photos to your girlfriends. It all comes down to being comfortable enough with them to be your true, goofy self. Most girls would happily send an unflattering photo of themselves sat on the toilet mid wee, or even pre-shower (believe me; ‘TMI’ doesn’t exist in most female friendships.). When sending nudes to a guy, however, you spend ridiculous amounts of time arching your back so

viciously that it has the potential to break, just so your bum looks perfectly round and pert. Pushing your arms inwards to lift your ta-ta’s to the high heavens. All of that hard-work and wasted energy to receive a mundane heart-eye emoji – maybe two if he’s feeling generous. All the while, your BFF wouldn’t hesitate to shower you with genuine declarations of praise and appreciation.

I know what I’d rather choose.

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